As we were finalizing this post, we heard news of yet another school shooting, in Uvalde, Texas. Hearing about the deaths of 19 "beautiful, innocent children" and two teachers, we are filled with sadness, rage and exhaustion. We hold all of this loss in our hearts, and the words below stand.

Like many of you, I was devastated by the racist attack in Buffalo, NY, on May 14. This wasn’t an “isolated incident” from a mentally deranged person. We hold so much collective responsibility for this attack – including the media who have brought the hateful “great replacement theory” into the mainstream, as well as our nation’s weak gun control laws.

My religious tradition, Judaism, teaches that when a person dies, a whole world is destroyed. Ten worlds were destroyed: The worlds of Celestine Chaney, Roberta A. Drury, Andre Mackniel, Katherine Massey, Margus D. Morrison, Heyward Patterson, Aaron Salter, Geraldine Talley, Ruth Whitfield, and Pearl Young.

As details of this event emerged, I struggled to focus and find some equilibrium. I want to say that I struggled to “make sense” of this. But what kind of sense can we make of being murdered for going to the grocery store?

My equilibrium is beside the point. I have been listening to the words of Black community members as they took in the pain and terror of this event.

A viral post by Simone Crawley, a Black DEI (Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion) consultant, knocked the wind out of me:

“My 86-year-old grandmother, Ruth Whitfield, was murdered on Saturday by a hate-filled, perverted White supremacist GROWN MAN. If it had been ANY other cause I could process it differently. I could rationalize it somehow. But this is too close to home for me. How do you dedicate your life to fighting bigotry, trying to educate White people on their role in ending this blight on humanity all for it to take your own grandmother??!! I feel like such a f--- failure!!!! I feel like everything I’ve ever done in my career was completely pointless! I know that it should make me want to double down and be proof of why it’s such important work but I promise you I feel the opposite. I feel like a fraud. Like I’ve been spoon-feeding White people these conversations about race so as not to upset them. Feeding into the White fragility over and over again. Asking them about their racist relatives and having them tell me that it’s not a reflection of them. BUT IT IS!!!!!!!!!! You have chosen the side of hate every second that you remain silent. Telling us that White children can’t handle conversations about race but my grandmothers’ great grandchildren must look at her dead body! And I will have to tell my children her story because she won’t be there to meet them. The last time I saw her we were sitting in her living room and she was telling stories about her childhood in the rural South. Stories about the racism she has endured since birth and I cannot believe it is the reason her life is over. She had at least 20 more years left to live- she didn’t use a walker, or a hearing aid, even have significant sight issues. I always struggled to even see her as elderly….”

I don’t know Crawley. But she leads the same kinds of conversations that we lead.

Her grief and disillusionment are so deep that she feels like giving up. In the face of violence, it feels like the conversations that she leads around racism aren’t changing anything, aren’t making a difference and have no value.

I heard many perspectives like this last week. One Black colleague described bringing together a group of Black leaders who had no words – the best they could do to find equilibrium was take some time to pray together.

For those of us in the swirl of so much hard news, what do we do in these moments?

1. Acknowledge how hard it is right now. And that, like everything else, the burden isn’t hitting each of us equally. Those who experience racism on a daily basis are feeling the terror of this event on top of the inequities of our society.

2. Do what you need to do to take care of yourself so that you do not give up hope; do not give in to burnout. I can’t tell Simone Crawley what to do – I honor her grief and whatever process she needs to go through. But if we all give up, the hate-filled terrorists win. I had the privilege of spending a few days in the woods this past weekend. My head is clearer. I have more energy to keep fighting.

3. For white people especially, and anyone with power and privilege – go to the edge of your comfort zone. Then go further. As Crawley says, “talk about White supremacy as the absolute fabric of our nation and what YOU plan to do about it.”

The Ross Collective holds a vision of an equitable, abundant shared future in which people of all racial backgrounds thrive and prosper.

From that vision, we work backwards: What are the steps to move towards that vision?

As nationalism resurges throughout our country and around the world, all people with privilege and power must speak out. The only way we can drown out the hate is through more engagement and discussing these topics at every level.

What I infer from Crawley’s post is that we have work to do too. We should opine on these topics and let our voice be heard. This is part of our mission and work, and we have to ask: What actions are you taking to go further than the edge of your comfort zone?

Please share your thoughts with us – we’re happy to help amplify your efforts in any way that we can.