Mark (not his real name) looked around the board room table. Then he slowly but forcefully said to the other board members, “I don’t know why we are talking about this. This does not seem like an important conversation to have now.”

A dark cloud settled on the room. There was no response, except a deafening silence.

In the millisecond after Mark spoke up, I thought to myself, “This is it! This Board retreat is screwed. All those hours of hard work, for nothing. The Town Theater board has hit a wall, will not be able to move forward and our work has been a total failure.”

I looked around the table. Everyone was avoiding eye contact.

There was a part of me that believed Mark. He has a forceful personality. If he said these are the wrong topics, he must know what he is talking about!

Then I took a breath and dug from deep down. I was not going to let him do this. I knew what I had to do.

But first – let me back up.

Several months before, The Ross Collective had been engaged to facilitate a board retreat for an arts organization, which I will call Town Theater. (For confidentiality, details have been changed, including all names.)

Town Theater had some challenges.

On the positive side, they had rabid fans. There were people who LOVED the work they were doing and contributed time and money to keep it going.

In other words, Town Theater had a compelling mission and was contributing to the community in significant ways.

Their financial situation was relatively stable. They had done strong fundraising in the past and generated earned revenue.

On the other hand, the Town Theater board included a couple of difficult board members. Mark was particularly memorable.

Mark was a minor “celebrity” or at least a public figure in the circle in which Town Theater operated. He also had strong opinions about the direction of the organization. And although he had many ideas that he would express in the meetings, he was generally too busy to follow up on the execution of these ideas.

Two wonderful women had reached out to me: Pearl and Kara. They were board Executive Committee members. Board meetings had become so contentious – with what appeared to be different “factions” on the board – that board members could hardly be in a room together, much less move the work of the organization forward.

With all of this as background, they reached out to ask me to facilitate a board retreat. One goal was to build an action plan for the board. But a deeper goal was to get the board back on track and moving in a positive direction together.

We went through our well-tested process of building the retreat with a Design Team.

We came up with a structure that would clarify strengths and challenges to ensure that they had a plan moving forward.

I was not sure how the retreat would turn out. Given what had emerged in interviews with board members, I could predict there might be some hard moments. Often, I get a little nervous before leading a meeting. But in this case, it went way beyond butterflies – it felt like there was a stone in my stomach.

We opened the retreat as planned. The Discovery process had generated important data and board members spoke up to acknowledge past challenges and begin to build strategies to work together better going forward.

And then, Mark’s words.

I listened to the silence.

I took another breath.

I looked directly at Mark.

Kindly and firmly, I said to him, “These are the conversations that the Design Team thought were most critical. But it might be worth checking whether others still feel that we’re on the right track.”

I look around the room at the other board members.

In a second, Jake spoke up. “Mark, this is what we said we wanted to talk about. It has been productive so far. Let’s keep going.”

Kara nodded her head. “I appreciate the progress we’re making.”

Pearl nodded too. So did everyone else at the table.

The tension in the room dropped again. And the rest of the day was terrific.

When the retreat was over, Pearl walked up to me and said, “I feel like a 100-pound weight has been lifted.”

Yes, I could understand!

When potential clients ask me why they need an effective retreat facilitator, I think back to Mark.

Because there are many “Marks” out there! Without a trained facilitator, it is difficult to know what to do.

Honestly, I also think back to Pearl and Kara. They are the heroines of this story. They wanted the group to work together better and deserved that!

But they did not have the expertise to lead the process.

Let’s say you don’t have a Mark on your board. Do you still need a trained facilitator?

Ten additional reasons to hire a retreat facilitator

If you can find the funds, it is well worth it to hire a retreat or strategic planning facilitator. In addition to running interference with the Marks of the world, here are ten more reasons:

1. Board or staff leaders participate in the process fully rather than having to lead it. This cannot be stated strongly enough. Board and staff members can focus on sharing their perspectives rather than the logistics of the retreat.

2. A retreat facilitator will steward this process with their full attention, rather than needing to focus on leading an organization.

3. A trained facilitator has worked with dozens, or even hundreds, of clients. When something unexpected emerges, this person has the expertise to keep the process moving forward.

4. When challenges come up, a trained facilitator can offer context across organizations about how other clients have resolved these issues.

5. A trained facilitator brings objectivity and insight and is able to focus on the task at hand.

6. A trained facilitator is also able to mediate conflicts as they arise. Often, retreats uncover strong feelings and motivations, which can be emotional. If there are unaddressed tensions going into a retreat, they may be revealed in such an event.

7. Often, conversations shift focus off topic. A facilitator also acts as a mediator to evaluate and determine the priority level of the shift. Sometimes this kind of event is good, as the discussion may have moved onto something not originally identified as important. Often, however, this kind of conversation is off topic and unimportant. The facilitator can evaluate and shepherd the discussion back on track.

8. A retreat facilitator usually keeps the conversations light, when possible, to engage participants and maintain a sense of productivity. Retreats can have long days, keeping everyone engaged is generally easier with an outside party.

9. Likewise, facilitators trim the waste of meetings; by keeping them focused and on track, a trained facilitator will ensure that the retreat will not get far off track. That helps to reach the objectives of the event.

10. A skilled facilitator will complete the retreat with actionable steps for the board and organization. A productive event will end with understanding across the board members, likely with resolved conflicts, a confirmed mission and values of the organization, and an action plan to implement the identified individual and organizational changes.

How to become a retreat facilitator

Our clients often ask about resources for becoming a retreat facilitator. Our initial facilitator training was through the Technology of Participation (ToP) Network. We did a several-day workshop on ToP Methods, another on ToP Strategic Planning, and then did coaching with workshop instructors in order to apply the knowledge from the workshops. We also did training with Interaction Institute for Social Change.

In 2020, we did an additional year-long course on Mastering the Technology of Participation.

We are active participants in the ToP Network and keep learning. New techniques and processes continue to emerge, such as virtual facilitation tools and practices.

Given our focus and interest on racial equity, we have done training from the Rise Center for Racial Justice on Facilitating Racially Just Spaces, and continue to participate in Rise’s community of practice.

The benefits of working with a trained facilitator

As we have shared before, the benefits of working with a trained, experienced facilitator include clarity, energy, and alignment at the end of the process. Board and staff members feel that their time was well-spent and that the organization is on a good path. So they want to come back and continue to contribute.

While we’ve facilitated more than one hundred retreats, we’ve also completed many more hours of training. We have seen the benefits first-hand and recommend that organizations make time to pause and review. By definition, retreats are times for members to be creative and take that time to refocus on what’s most important for your organization.

Are you considering hiring a facilitator for your next planning process? Contact us to reach out, we would be happy to tell you more about how working with a trained, experienced facilitator can transform your nonprofit organization.